why they DON'T work

WHY ARE A LOT OF RELATIONSHIPS FAILURES??

... and by failure, i mean that the "original title" given to the said relationship does not workout.

For me, I think that there are four reasons why relationships (including friendship, romantic relationships, and relative-ships) don't work out

disclaimer:: for the sake of not have much confusion.. the examples will be in the sense of a romantic relationship

EXPECTATIONS -- a strong belief that something will happen or be the case in the future

WORK -- activity involving mental or physical effort done in order to achieve a purpose or result

TRUST -- firm belief in the reliability, truth, ability, or strength of someone or something

COMMUNICATION -- the successful conveying or sharing of ideas and feelings

expectations::

People often go into relationships with a lot of expectations. I mean it would be stupid and naive to not have any expectations, because then you would have absolutely no standards and that's just NAHT smart. BUTT (and yes I did spell it with two t's). It is even more stupid and more naive to think the each and every one of the expectation that you hold your partner to will be fulfilled to your degree.

The first mistake that is made with expectations is that people often made too many, and unreasonable expectations for the significant other to fulfill. For example:: say a really rich girl got with a guy who grew up in the projects taking care of his family because his daddy wasn't around. Now the girl goes into the relationship with the ideals of a man who is upscale, high-class, waits on her hand and foot, likes to spend money in order to have fun. For the girl to think the the guy could fulfill ALL of these expectations is absurd.

The second mistake that people make is not only do people go into relationship with ridiculous amount of expectations, but they actually think that allllllll the expectations will be satisfied. Its like getting a cat and then one day asking it to bark. Is it gonna happen?... NEGATIVE

work::

it is crazy the amount of work put in when two people are courting or even just trying to get each other's attention. I guy will go to great lengths in order to "bag" a girl. And a girl will call in all her "man-terpretation powers" in order to get a guy. BUT WHY when the two finally get together does this crazy work ethic they BOTH had go out the window... for BOTH of them.. It is like as soon as the relationship begins people think that the work is over.. WRONG.. this is were people fail.. and where relationships do to... you must work to keep a relationship going. You can't bail at the first sight of trouble...

trust::

this should be a NO BRAINER.. but apparently it's not... for a relationship to work both parties must trust each other fully. that's it.. You have to be able to trust you partner with you body, your feelings, your secrets, your credit card, you hear, your mind, you EVERYTHING. I can write a novel on how important trust is... but I won't. But I feel like the most successful relationship have come about becuase both people trusted each other... and if it was not full trust, then it was the same level and understanding of trust. Ne-Yo says "I believe that love and trust are one in the same. I don't think you can truly love somebody unless you trust them. That blind trust, that beyond a shadow of a doubt, no matter what this person sayin', that person sayin', you believe your man"

commincation::

again, I feel as though this should be a no brainer but it has found it's way on my list... You gotta talk. You have to let the other person know how you feel, what you want, what you need. Tell them everything, as they should to you. Not only talk about emotions and such, but talk about the Red Sox or Obama or something... Conversation builds friendship. Friendship should be the base of the relationship. You have to know the person your in a relationship with. Communication is the grounds for all the other things like expectations, work, and trust. If the communication is set in a relationship then it is soo much easier for both people to understand the EXPECTATIONS of each other, to realize what the other person wants and what WORK needs to be done to achieve that. And when two people talk about.. everything.. then trust is naturally established amongst them, and can be nurtured into the trust needed for a healthy successful relationship.

that's all folks

peaceee

P.S... sometimes relationships don't work because we're scared...

quotee : "So scared of the heartbreak. So scared of makin' mistakes. I keep runnin', when all I really need is you" - Jesse McCartney